Is Teen Social Media Addiction Even a Real Thing?

Lifestyle
Reading Time: 4 minutes

INTERVIEW ON THE PRICE OF BUSINESS SHOW, MEDIA PARTNER OF THIS SITE.

Recently Kevin Price, Host of the nationally syndicated Price of Business Show, welcomed Dr. Bill Senyard to provide another commentary in a series.

In this show, Dr. Bill Senyard discusses the addictive power of the innocuous ‘like’ button, some version of which exists on every social media platform. There are two critical questions that parents of adolescents should be asking, “What is your child actually getting from his or her social media of choice?” and “What is it replacing in their lives?”

 

Dr. Bill Senyard here with Gospel App Ministries (www.gospel-app.com) and Good Enough Parent (www.goodenoughparent.online). So, is social media really dangerous to our adolescents? More than we want to know. I often get asked by parents “How many hours a day of social media does it take to be considered an addict? Is it 2 hours a day? 4? 6?”

I am going to suggest this is the wrong question. The two better questions are these.

  • What is your child actually getting from his or her social media of choice?
  • What is it replacing in their lives?

 

Question #1?

Let me start with the innocuous looking ‘like’ button. Here’s Max Fisher from his must-read book, The Chaos Machine. He writes that the little button’s appeal and social media’s addictive power comes from something called the sociometer. Psychologist Mark Leary’s theory now widely held is that

“Self-esteem is in fact a psychological gauge of the degree to which people perceive that they are relationally valued and socially accepted by other people…Facebook’s “Like” feature, some version of which now exists on every platform, is the equivalent of a car battery hooked up to that sociometer. It gives whoever controls the electric jolts tremendous power over our behavior. It’s not just that ‘likes’ provide the social validation we spend so much of our energy pursuing; it’s that they offer it at an immediacy and scale heretofore unknown in the human experience. …When’s the last time fifty, sixty, seventy people publicly applauded you off-line? On social media, it’s a normal morning…In fact, the incentive is so powerful that it even shows up on brain scans. When we receive a Like, neural activity flares in a part of the brain called the nucleus accumbens.”

Your teens are unknowingly getting endless subtle dopamine hits from their screen everyday with very little effort or cost. Social media offers your teen a much smaller dopamine hit than they would get from cocaine, but an endless supply that is readily available. The user doesn’t have to go to some sketchy part of town and fork over hundreds of dollars at great risk. They only have to open up Facebook, or TikTok, or X.

“Social media is designed to hook our brains, and teens are especially susceptible to its addictiveness,” says Nancy DeAngelis, Director of Behavioral Health, Jefferson Health – Abington.

 

So, question #2. What is social media replacing in our child’s life? All humans are created to relationally connect with other human beings, beginning with parents and family but expanding to others, including to find ultimate fulfilment in a relationship with the triune God. God made it so that when we connect or when we look into the face of others and see them liking us, we get dopamine hits. We are created to long for connections so that we do not isolate and experience loneliness, and shame.

But, if your child can get endless dopamine hits from social media, why would they need to work on developing relationships with anyone, you, or with God? Yet, in the end, social media use will not satisfy that itch. Teens who use social media more than three hours per day are at heightened risk for mental health problems such as loneliness, depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, eating disorders, gender dysphoria, and suicide ideation.

 

On my on-line free resource for Christian parents, Good Enough Parent Tip #11, I offer this template for parents to begin to displace social media just a little on their child’s radar. Here’s a part of it. Randomly walk up to them, get their attention, and say something like this.

Dear son/daughter,

Do you know how much I adore you?  When I look deep in your eyes– into your weary and beat up eyes, do you know what I feel?  I am stunned at what I see. You were made for a particular purpose of great glory and creativity. I am sure of it.  It all fits, your eye color, your hair color, and your stubbornness because no other colors or traits would do. I can’t wait to see how you will change the world. We will not always agree on everything, but I will always be your biggest fan. I will always have your back—no matter what.

 

Don’t wait for a response. Move on. It is a positive sociological drive-by-shooting. Wash, rinse and repeat.

If you want to know more, check out Good Enough Parent (www.goodenoughparent.online).

Let me know what you think. Bill@Gospel-App.com.

 

Proclaiming the love of God for the unlovable, the unloved, and the unlovely.Dr. Senyard and the team at Gospel App Ministries have created a number of dynamic and helpful tools and resources to help professionals help their clients flourish. These tools include The Forgiving Path (www.forgivingpath.com), Good Enough Parent (www.goodenoughparent.online), Gospel App, Engage small group resources, and Take Heart YZ discipleship materials for young adults (www.gospel-app.com).Our passion at Gospel App Ministries is to help Christians thrive by developing tools and resources that help all of us better apply the Gospel to the real lives of real people in the real world.

Dr. Bill Senyard

www.gospel-app.com

Facebook: gospelappministries

Linked In: dr. bill senyard

Twitter/X: thekissesofgod

Instagram: gospelapp

YouTube: drbillsenyard

Good Enough Parent: www.goodenoughparent.online

 

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